


Since you were eighteen

by apolloxbvcky



Series: Stevebucky playlist [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Fix-It, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, Oblivious Steve Rogers, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, tony and steve are friends again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-22
Updated: 2018-08-22
Packaged: 2019-07-01 06:11:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15768219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apolloxbvcky/pseuds/apolloxbvcky
Summary: Steve narrates Tony how he realized he was in love with his best friend





	Since you were eighteen

Steve let himself fall on one of the chairs surrounding the table. The party was nice, it was good, he was thankful of T’Challa and Tony organizing it to help everybody have a little bit of fun after the fight. But he was too tired. Too damn tired.

Two years of running had peaked on a war against a purple alien and his army, and he needed to sit down for a while.

He had his eye on Bucky, though. He always did. The brunette was on the other side of the room, talking to Shuri, the Spider boy and Okoye. Steve smiled. He loved to see that Bucky had more people now, other than him.

He felt someone sitting on the chair beside his. He looked to the person, seeing Tony with two glasses of transparent liquid, one on each hand.

“I know you can’t get drunk, with the serum and all. But I promise you this one at least tastes good.” he said, offering him one of the glasses. Steve chuckled, taking it.

“Thank you, Tony.” he said, sipping on it. “You know what? I get it now.”

Steve frowned, confused. “What?”

“Why you did everything you did back in Europe, two years ago. I should have payed more attention, though, because it’s crystal clear.”

“I don’t know what you…”

“Cut the bullshit, Cap. I just had to look at you looking at him, and the way back. It’s pretty obvious. Hey, it hurts my ego that I didn’t know back then.”

Steve stopped looking at Tony, moving his head to the right to look at Bucky, who was now with Nat. He was laughing at something he had said, meanwhile Nat was rolling her eyes, with a little smile on her lips. Steve unconsciously smiled too.

“See?” he heard Tony. “That’s exactly what I meant. How long?”

“How long what?” “How long have you been in love with him?”

Steve almost chocked on his drink, and Tony burst out laughing, seeing the blonde struggling to keep the liquor on his mouth. When they both calmed down, Steve cleared his throat.

“He was eighteen. I was sixteen.”

“What?”

“When I fell in… When I realized I was in love with him. He was eighteen, and I was sixteen.”

Tony lifted the glass to his lips. “Hm. Tell me about it.”

 

_May 1935, Brooklyn, New York._

_“Ouch” Steve complaint, closing his eyes, when Bucky pressed the wet cloth against his swollen lip._

_“You deserve it.” the brunette said, taking off the cloth nonetheless. Steve rolled his eyes as Bucky took one of the few bandages left on the first aid kit he had on his bathroom. “It’s the third time this month, Steve. And it’s only the 12th.”_

_“What was I supposed to do? Run away?”_

_“Yeah, that was a good option. Or called me.”_

_“I don’t need you to save me every time I get into a fight.”_

_“The thing is, Stevie. You shouldn’t be getting into fights in the first place.” Steve crossed his arms above his chest, looking away. “You only do that because you know I’m right. What would have happened if I didn’t find you there?” he said, pointing at the wound on the bond’s arm, still bleeding. “Did you want to bleed to death? You can’t do that to Sarah, Rogers.”_

_Steve looked down at the mention of his mother. He wasn’t trying to hurt her, he swore. Damn, he didn’t even want her to know. That’s why Bucky was patching him up, instead of her. But what was he supposed to do against that situation? That girl needed to be saved. He was glad to say that she had gotten away, even if he had ended beaten up. He trembled when Bucky pressed the cloth against his lip once more. “Can you stop doing that?” he whispered._

_“I will. When it stops bleeding. Would you rather if I kissed it?” Steve looked at Bucky. He was obviously joking, but still, the blond frowned. Recently, he had been feeling awkward around Bucky. Every time he touched him, he would shiver, and when he saw him with dames, his stomach would start hurting. When they were close, Steve would feel warm, even if it was winter and they didn’t have heat. And hearing him say that had made his blood go south, God knows why. He could also feel his cheeks blushing. And Bucky felt it too, because he suddenly chuckled and said “Hey, pal, come on. It was just a joke.” Steve looked away, waiting for his cheeks to go back to white, meanwhile Bucky finished putting the bandage on his arm. “Take your shirt off.”_

_“Wh-what?” Steve said, looking back at his friend._

_“I want to see if you have any bruises. Come on, take it off.”_

_“Oh. R-right.” he said. Slowly, he unbuttoned his blood-stained shirt and took it off. Doing so, he could feel Bucky’s eyes on his chest, making it incredibly hard to breathe, and making his heart go faster than it ever did. What was going on with him?_

_“Oh, God. Steve, you’re going to get killed one of these days.” he said, raising his hand to touch the bruise on the blond’s ribs. It was bigger than his hands. “Can you breathe?”_

_No. But it wasn’t the bruise’s fault._

_“Yes.” Steve said, taking a deep breath, showing him. Bucky chuckled._

_“I’m forbidding you of even going out until you’re completely okay.” he ordered._

_“You’re not the boss of me. And I have class…”_

_“I’ll escort you.”_

_“What? No! I’m not a princess.”_

_“I know. But you don’t seem to get your head out of your ass either. It’s the only way I can get you out of the fights.”_

_“You’re not escorting me. No. No way, Bucky.”_

_“Then promise me you won’t get into any fights.”_

_“I… will try.” Bucky sighed._

_“Enough for me. Here.” he said, handing Steve the wet, also blood-stained cloth. “It’s still bleeding. I’ll go get you some water.” Bucky left the bathroom, where they had been sitting the whole time, Steve on the border of the bathtub and Bucky on the toilet, one in front of the other. Steve sighed, putting the wet cloth on his lips, adding a little bit of pressure to it. He was still feeling weird. His stomach felt like it was spinning and didn’t seem to want to stop, and it was making him sick. Maybe he really was sick. He stood up, walking to the kitchen, where Bucky was, and handed him the cloth._

_“I need to go home.” he said. Bucky looked at him and took the cloth, putting it on the counter._

_“I’ll go with you, just give me a minute.”_

_“No. I mean… there’s no need. I’ll… It’s just two blocks. Nobody will do anything to me. Don’t worry.” Bucky stayed silent, looking down to his feet._

_“Okay, I believe you. But… Be careful, okay?” Steve nodded, and Bucky took him by the shoulder, dragging him closer and giving him a one armed hug. Steve sniffed his scent. Since Bucky had started working with his father down the docks, he always smelled like the sea. Steve had grown used to that scent, but when he hugged Bucky, it was bigger, almost as if he was on the sea himself. He loved that feeling._

 

_Twenty minutes later, Steve was already home, waiting for her mother to come. She was a nurse, so she would know what was wrong with him. It wasn’t until two hours later that she arrived._

_“Steve?” she asked. “What are you doing here?”_

_“Uh, Bucky had to do another shift today, so… I didn’t have anywhere else to be.” Sarah smiled, nodding and heading to the kitchen. “Mom, can I ask you something?” he said, following her._

_“Of course, sweetheart.” she said, taking the dirty dishes and opening the tab, starting to wash them. “Do you happen to know if I’m allergic to cats?”_

_“Not that I know of, why?” “Well, the Loebs just got one, and Becca sometimes take care of it, bringing it onto their house and leaving its hair everywhere around Bucky’s house, and lately, when I’ve been there, I’ve been feeling weird.”_

_“Huh” Sarah said, handing the wet dishes to Steve, who took a cloth and started drying them. “Symptoms?”_

_“Well, my stomach feels weird, like spinning, and sometimes it’s like I’ve got a knot there. And I get red, as if I were blushing, and sometimes I freeze, like, I can’t think straight…”_

_Sarah chuckled. “Honey, that’s not allergies.”_

_“It’s not?” Steve asked, taking another dish._

_“No, baby. That’s a crush.”_

_“A-a crush?”_

_“Uh huh. Tell me, do you feel hot too?”_

_“Yes, sometimes.”_

_“Usually when someone special is around?” Steve blushed, and nodded again._

_“There you go. A crush.” Steve sighed. A crush? On whom? Bucky? No, it couldn’t be. He was his best friend. And… a man. He couldn’t have a crush on his male best friend. He would end up in jail. Or worse._

_“A-and what do I do?” he asked, stuttering. “_

_Well…” Sarah closed the tab, looking at his son. “You know how things work around here… It’s up to you. And him, of course. You can tell him how you feel, and maybe it’s reciprocate. But it will have to remain secret, and you both will have to end up marrying women.” she placed her hand on his son’s cheek. “Just so you know, Steve, that I don’t care if you love Bucky, or another person, be it a girl o a boy. I still love you, and I’m proud of you.” Steve smiled, pulling closer to his mother, and hugging her._

 

 

“I didn’t say anything until the war, though.” Steve said when he finished, sipping from his glass. “When I saved him from Zola, and we had to walk back from Austria to Italy. One of those nights, I told him. And he told me. And we’ve been together ever since.”

“What about Peggy?”

“I loved her, too. Not in the same way. I thought about what my mother said. I’d have to get married to a woman. And I thought that if I really had to, she was the better option. I talked it with him, and he was okay with it. She knew too. And she was okay with it.”

“Wow, Cap. You really are a box of surprises.” Tony said, pulling his glass on front of Steve. The latter laughed, hitting softly his glass against Tony’s. “I’m sorry about… the whole accords thing. I guessed I would have done the same thing for Pepper.”

“Water under the bridge, Tony. We’re good now. I’m sorry about going rogue and never tell you about Howard and Maria. You deserved to know.”

Tony sighed. “Guess we both did things wrong.”

“But we’ve done many things right too.”

Tony nodded at him, and they both stayed talking for a while, until they saw Bucky walking towards them, and Steve stopped mid-sentence to look at his boyfriend.

“I’m tired.” the Sergeant said. “I want to go to bed.” Steve smiled, standing up and taking Bucky’s hand, kissing his temple.

“Okay. I’m tired too.” he looked at Tony. “I’m really glad that we’re both good now, Stark.”

“Back at you, Rogers.” he said, raising his glass, and winking at the couple.

Steve smiled, shaking his head, and started walking out of the room, with his boyfriend’s metal fingers threaded with his own.

“What were you talking about?” Bucky asked, his head resting against the blond’s shoulder.

“You.” Steve smiled, looking down at him and smiling.


End file.
